Through the Years
by PCGirl
Summary: Complete. Futuristic story of Jolie and flashbacks of the aftermath of the Cris secret being revealed.
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: All characters are property of ABC/Disney and their subsidiaries. Not myself. I'm just using them to give my readers a story.

A/N: Ok, Jess--you really don't HAVE to post within the next three days, but I'd like it a lot. Hope you all--whether you've read it at the yahoo board, or been sent a personal e-mail, or this is the first time you've read it--enjoy the story. :) Until next time--PCGirl.

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Natalie stood and watched the other passengers walk on by—a grin appearing on her face when she saw the top of red hair walking slowly. Oh what a couple of months would do to a mother. She hadn't even seen Meghan's face but she couldn't wait to hug her baby girl and best friend—not that Meghan was a baby anymore. She was eighteen and away at college—it had hurt Natalie's heart to think of letting her leave the nest but Thomas had just moved into an apartment nearby, though he almost always came home with his dad.

She couldn't picture her life without her two children—or John. She remembered a time when she thought she'd lost it all.

"_Excuse me? What did you just say?" asked Natalie as she and John ate breakfast at the Palace. Her eyes were set on Layla—not noticing the color in John's face had drained out moments before when Layla dropped the bomb of a lifetime._

"_Do you want me to speak slowly and use smaller words? Christian is alive and John's known the whole time."_

"_How dare you stand here in front of me and try to soil both my late husband and John's good name," she said as she stood up shakily—John was silent and as she looked over she realized something wasn't quiet right._

"_Ask him," she said defiantly._

"_John—tell her she's wrong. Tell her she has no clue what she's talking about," she said as she turned to him and he couldn't look her in the eye. "Look at me—damn it—look at me!" she screamed, but he didn't and wouldn't._

_She wouldn't let Layla see her break—she wouldn't let anyone see her break as her world came crashing down. A world that for months made her feel like she was on cloud nine. Well, now the cloud had evaporated and she was headed back to Earth without a parachute._

_She didn't even think of grabbing her purse as she turned and ran—running into Jessica who didn't say a word—just took her twin's shoulder and lead her out of the Palace and staring eyes at the scene that just had unfolded._

Tomorrow was her and John's twentieth wedding anniversary—on that day if someone had told her she'd even be with John another day she would have laughed at them, but it was the truth and she couldn't see herself happier than when she was with him.

Natalie stood there and watched her daughter's eyes meet hers and Meghan came running to her, "Hey sweetheart," she said as she hugged her tight. "How was the flight?"

"It was good," she smiled as they turned and began to walk to wait on the luggage to arrive. "I did some reading for school on the plane and listened to music—can I borrow the car later tonight? I wanted to see if maybe Lauren wants to go to a movie or something."

"Sure," she smiled—Lauren was Jess and Nash's daughter—just a year older than Meghan herself, but they had become joined at the hip when Meghan was just a baby. Her and Jess had laughed at how they seemed to mirror their mother's—in both looks and personality.

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"Anyone home?" yelled Thomas as he lead the way into the house he'd grown up in—his father coming behind him, taking his leather jacket off and hanging it up, while Thomas just threw his jacket over the side of the couch.

John was proud of his son—he was a month away from graduating from the Academy and was going to be the top recruit in his class. He heard laughter from the kitchen and walked in to see Meghan helping out cooking, "Hey."

"Dad!" she shouted as she ran and threw her arms around him. "We didn't hear you come in."

"That's cause they were too busy gossiping," laughed Thomas as he walked in and received a hug also. "How's college life, sis?"

"It's great," she said as Thomas grabbed a bundle of grapes and sat down at the kitchen table with his twin and catch up on life.

"Don't eat too many—dinner's almost ready," said Natalie absently as she finished making the garlic bread and putting it in the oven.

"Yes, Mom," he laughed as he glanced out of the corner of his eye and watched his dad come walk behind her and slip his hands around her waist and then went back to talking with Meghan.

"How was work?" asked Natalie to John.

"It was—well, work," he shrugged, nuzzling his face into her hair and breathing deep. "I love you, Natalie."

"I love you too," she said as she turned around and he held her tighter and pulled her into a kiss.

"John—the kids—are at—the table."

He laughed, "I know—I just missed you. I'm used to seeing you at lunchtime."

She smiled, "Yeah—I know, but I had to finish doing some things for the party tomorrow and then I picked Meghan up and we've just spent the day talking."

"You got your girl back home. Happy now?" he smirked, knowing how lonely she'd felt without her nearby to talk to.

"Yeah," she said as tears started to well up for no reason.

"Hey—what's wrong?"

"I'm just glad our family is back together for just a few days—it sounds so crazy, but you know how I've always been—Family is the most important thing John, and I'm so glad I chose to have mine with you."


	2. Chapter 2

"Morning," smiled John as Natalie opened her eyes to see him lying next to her. In the morning light she could pick out the silver hairs that she teased showed up more everyday.

"Happy Anniversary," she said as she leaned up for a kiss.

"Oh yeah—that's today, isn't it?" he laughed, trying to be unassuming. "I guess you want some type of present, huh?"

"Being married to you for twenty years is enough of a present for me."

"Then I guess you don't want this then—maybe Meghan would like it," he shrugged as he reached back and pulled open his bedside drawer and took out a small box that was wrapped beautifully.

"You didn't wrap this, did you?" she laughed as she began to unwrap it.

"That obvious?" he laughed.

"Yeah," she said as she pulled out the soft grey box.

It had started on their wedding day—a simple gold bracelet with a single charm on it—a small disc with their wedding date on one side and their initials on the other. He'd kept giving her a new one every year and on special moments in their life together. She'd been wondering what this year's would be and as she opened the box she gasped—this year there was no charm but a gold ring with two diamonds on each side and a beautiful dark sapphire in the center, "It's beautiful."

"Like you," he smiled at her reaction and took it out of the box.

"When did you buy this?" she asked as he held it on the tip of his finger.

"Remember a few weeks ago when I had an out of town investigation?" he asked as she nodded and tears filled her eyes. "Well, I didn't have an investigation—I went and met up with Meghan that Saturday and we went to a jewelry shop and she helped me pick this out. Read the inside," he said as he handed it back to her.

She tilted the ring so she could read the inside, _Love Always, J, M, and T. _"Oh John," she sighed as she threw her arms around him. "How did I get you?"

"Just lucky I guess," he said as they broke their embrace before he took the ring from her and placed it on her finger. "Happy Anniversary, Natalie."

"Happy Anniversary," she said as he suddenly covered her mouth and pushed her back into the pillows. Even twenty something years later they still had the same passion as when they first got together.

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"Morning Mom," said Meghan as she sat on the small breakfast nook at the house off of the kitchen. She watched her mom get a cup of coffee before joining her on the bench.

"Hey sweetie—did you have a good time last night?"

"Yeah," she nodded softly. "We ran into Jamie though—and you know that never ends on a good note."

"I know," she said softly herself. The Vega's and Buchanan's had not been friendly towards each other in a very long time and though both Meghan and Lauren tried their best to be civil, the other end was not reciprocating it in the least. In reality it had happened the same exact day that the truth came out.

"_Here—drink this," said Jessica as she placed the small delicate tea cup into Natalie's hands and all but poured it down her throat. She hadn't said much since she left the Palace—except that she wanted to go home. When they got there she remembered she forgot her purse, but there was already a message from Renee saying she'd drop it off on the way home this evening._

"_Why did you want us to meet you there?" asked Natalie—shoving her own problems to the side for the moment. Normally Jess would have called and suggested the diner to eat, but this time she'd said the Palace would be better._

"_It's nothing Natalie, don't worry," she said as she patted her on the leg and got up to make herself a cup._

"_Please—I don't want to worry about my own crazy love life at the moment. What made you chose the Palace over the diner today? Something didn't happen with Antonio did it?"_

_Jess put the teapot down and hung her head for a moment, "Last night I told Antonio I wanted to take a break—that I was confused. I've—I've been seeing Nash lately."_

"_Are you having problems with Tess wanting to come back out?" asked Natalie—now fully focused on her sister instead of the choices she needed to make._

"_No," she shook her head. "Every time we've seen each other I've been fully aware of what I was doing. I did it first to try and get a hold of who Tess was—how she acted around him. He's in love with her, and a part of me can see why. He's really a great guy—and that's why I'm confused. I've loved Antonio forever, but Nash—he's different and I want to know if it's Tess or me, Jessica, that's interested in him. Don't worry about me Natalie—I'll figure out what's right for me. What about you? Do you know what you want to do next?"_

"_Yeah—it's not much, but it'll be a start."_

Jessica and Antonio never did get back together—the more she and Nash hung out the more she began to fall in love with him—for the same exact reasons that Tess loved him. Antonio had lost custody of Jamie then—mainly due to Layla being seen as an unfit role-model for the little girl.

Antonio had blamed Jessica and continued to blame Jessica at every opportunity that he could get until the court granted him longer scheduled visitations six months later. By that point Jessica was pregnant with Lauren.

Natalie remembered a day in the park when the girls were little—Jamie came over and played with them for awhile until Antonio showed up—where he'd been for the time before that they didn't know, but he dragged Jamie off and they heard him tell her to not play with them—that neither of their mother's cared about her when she was younger and so she shouldn't care about anyone with the last name Buchanan either.

"So do you want your present now or later?" asked Meghan as she pulled the small box out from beside her.

"Sweetie—you didn't have to get me something."

"I know—it's just a little something from me and Thomas—we figured you were missing getting one this year," she said as she watched her mom take the box out and open the small jewelry box. "Well?"

"I love it," she laughed as she moved the little charm around in the box—it was of a small slot machine "You two are the best," she said giving Meghan a big hug.

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John sat down at his desk to work on some paperwork—he wouldn't have come in on his Saturday off if Natalie hadn't gone shopping with Meghan, but he figured it would be safe for just an hour to be away—he couldn't be gone long though, she'd already told him he needed to get his tux for the party tonight.

"What are you doing here today?" asked Matthew as he poked his head in the door.

"Just catching up on some stuff," he laughed. Matthew was considered his what—cousin by marriage? He was a damn good cop though—just like his dad. John and Bo laughed that when it came to both of them retiring that the chances of the head detective and chief of police being a McBain and Buchanan again were going to be pretty high.

"Alright, I'll see you later," said Matthew as he walked off.

"See ya," he said as he read over a file. They'd had numerous apartment b&e's lately—the latest address seemed familiar and he remembered why—it was the same building he and Natalie had lived in years ago.

_He heard the apartment door unlock but didn't move from the darkened living room—she was halfway across and to the bedroom they shared when he finally spoke, "Natalie."_

_She jumped and turned, "John? What are you doing in the dark? Why aren't you at work?" she asked, surprised by her caring at all for him at the moment._

"_I don't know—why are you here?"_

"_I came to get some clothes," she said, turning on a dimmer light so she could at least see his face._

"_So it's over, huh?" he asked as he grabbed the bottle of scotch and poured himself a glass._

"_I don't know John—I don't know what to do, but when I do—you'll be the first to know."_

"_I knew something, but I didn't tell you first and I've lost you—I get it if you don't ever want to talk to me again."_

"_John," she sighed. "You know what—nevermind. You sit here and give yourself a pity party because you deserve one. I'll make sure Michael comes to check on you later to make sure you didn't die of alcohol poisoning," she said as she turned and went into their bedroom, closing the door behind her. _

_She let out a brief sob before she grabbed a bag and filled it with clothes she needed. A few minutes later she walked out to see he was standing on the balcony of the apartment—he took a brief look at her—wanting her, ready to plead for her to stay, but he just turned back and let her walk out._

He'd avoided her for a week or two—she'd left the station and gone back to Rodi's, which she bought from Mac when he decided to retire somewhere warmer. Then Michael had sat down with him one night and changed everything.

"_Go away!" yelled John at the door as it kept pounding. He had been suspended from the force pending investigation into the entire matter and all he wanted do was sit in silence in the apartment he once shared with the woman he loved._

"_John—I'm not giving up," hollered Michael from the other side. "In fact," he said—unlocking the door and walking in—dropping an overnight bag next to his feet. "I'm moving in."_

"_Like hell you are. How'd you get a key to this place anyways? First Layla—now you." He said as he stood up and stumbled some._

"_That doesn't matter," said Michael as he slipped Natalie's key back into his pocket. "First of all we're going to remove you from the situation you've put yourself in," said Michael as he grabbed the empty beer bottles and half finished bottle of scotch that were on the coffee table. He went and put them in the kitchen, waving his hand in his face at the dirty dishes and empty pizza boxes all over the place. "Phew man—when was the last time you cleaned up around here?"_

"_It's been awhile, Mike," said John as he sat back down on the couch Putting his head down—all he wanted to do was be alone in his self-blame, why couldn't they let him have that if nothing else._

_Michael finished filling the trash bag up and ran water in the sink to let the dishes soak before he came back in and sat down next to John, patting him hard on the back, "Ok, let's talk."_

"_About what?" he asked, already knowing the answer._

"_Natalie—what are you going to do about her?"_

"_What is there? She's gone and I'm alone—again. Nothing else much I can do Mikey," he said finally sitting up and running a hand through his hair._

"_But you're wrong John—she's miserable—I can tell. You two are both the happiest when you are with each other."_

"_And how do you know that?"_

"_Because I see her everyday at Rodi's—she asks about you—wants to make sure you're ok. If you love her, if you miss her, if you want her in your life, then you've got to fight for her. _

"_That's all she wants John—is for you to fight for her. If you come around and push your way back into her life right now—show her that you made a mistake—sober up and maybe take a shower more than once a week then I think you'll have a pretty decent shot, Johhny."_

"_You think so?"_

"_Yeah—I do. Go for it man—what more do you have to lose?" he laughed as John shoved him and a slight grin appeared on his face for the first time in weeks._

So he had gone for it—it had been tough, but in the end he'd ended up getting the girl. Her happiness was all that mattered then, and it was all that mattered now.


	3. Chapter 3

A/N: Sorry for the delay--I was having a mind block when in reality--I just wasn't ready to write what I thought it was time to write. So this came out instead. Hehehe--ya'll enjoy. Until next time--PCGirl.

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"Man, look at the size of that rock!" shouted Roxy as she began Natalie's manicure. "It's real, right?"

"Roxy!" laughed Natalie. "Yes, it's real."

"Does Johnny know how to pick 'em or what?" she beamed.

"Well, Meghan did have some help," she said as smiled at her daughter who was sitting in the chair next to her.

Meghan laughed, "Dad really had no clue what he was doing—I'm glad I came to the rescue."

They all heard the front door ding open and then shuffle of feet as Lauren came flying around the corner, "Let me get a look at this ring."

"Did everyone know about this except me?" asked Natalie as Jess came up slowly.

"Nah, Meghan just told me in passing last night. You know how much I blab—she couldn't trust me before that," she laughed as she went over and pulled a chair up next to Meghan.

They were all chatting—Jess asking how Meghan was liking fashion design when the door opened again and Lauren opened her mouth, "Uhm—excuse me. This is a private party—come back later."

"Lauren Victoria Brennan!" scolded Jess as the door closed again.

"Who was it?"

"It was Jamie," she sighed.

"Hold on Rox—I'll be right back," said Natalie as she stood up out of her chair and went to catch up with her. "Hey—Jamie wait up—ignore my niece in there—she somehow inherited my big mouth. If you want to wait until we're done though you can."

"No, it's ok—I'll just come back later," she said softly and began to turn.

"I heard you've got some pieces entered in Cris' next art exhibit—I'll make sure to come by and see them."

"Why do you care?" she snapped.

"Because I've always loved Cristian's artwork—he's an amazing artist and I'm sure you've inherited his gift. Plus with you being around Lindsay growing up you were always been around art—it's practically given that you'll have some talent."

"Why do you care about either of us? I mean you chose John years ago—why do my Uncle's paintings matter to you?"

"He was my first love, Jamie—I can't change that. Did you know I have a few of his pieces in my house?"

"Really?"

"Yeah," she said—she was sure none of the Vega's new about that—she'd always worked with Lindsay as an unknown buyer when she had purchased them years ago. "So you want to join us?"

"You wouldn't mind?"

"No—life's too short to hold grudges—and you should know something about the person before you make an opinion about them. You'd think with Lauren being a reporter she'd know that by now. So what do you say?"

"Sure," she shrugged and turned to walk back with Natalie.

Natalie knew the conversation they just had was long overdue but maybe it would have an impact on the relationship of the three girls.

Since she'd married with John she'd had very few conversations with Cristian—but still remembered the first conversation she had after she found out the truth.

_Natalie walked down and took a seat at the window they'd given her--number 13—why such an unlucky number?_

_She sat down in the cold metal seat and waited—it was a few minutes before he came to the other side of the iron grate, sitting down but not looking her in the eye for a moment—finally looking up and she could see it—it really was Cristian, her Cristian, but what was she going to do? Go back to him when she still loved John—she'd made herself admit that though she was upset with him she knew she couldn't turn off her love for him just like that. Just like she never could turn her love for Cristian off—especially not now when he needed her._

_She waited a moment before speaking, "It really is you."_

"_Yeah—though I don't feel like I'm the same person now."_

"_I'm not the same person either, Cris. Why did you think it was ok to keep the truth from me?"_

"_Because I knew I'd never get out of here—and I know you Natalie. I know you would wait for me and waste your life away for me. I'm not worth it."_

_A bit of anger boiled up inside of her, "You are too worth it, and shouldn't I have been the one to make that choice? Not you. Not John. What I do with my life is my choice, and if I wanted to sit and wait for you then I should have been given that option. _

"_Instead you two both gave me the option of mourning you again—I couldn't figure out why I didn't realize it was a complete stranger sleeping next to me and not my husband. Do you know how that feels Cris? To believe I let a stranger see me like you did—to touch me like you did?" she said, as tears filled her eyes and she tried to wipe them away but they returned._

_He shook his head and whispered, "I'm sorry. I thought it was the best thing."_

"_It wasn't," she said as she took a deep breath. "Bo says he thinks they'll be able to get you out now that they know you were brain washed—but they still need to know who it was that did it."_

"_I think I know—I told Evangeline some of it when she'd come to visit me."_

_She shivered at the name—Evangeline had yet to meet the wrath Natalie had built up inside her, but it was coming—and if she was as smart of a lawyer as she claimed to be she'd run out of town before Natalie had the chance, "Good—you don't deserve to be in here."_

"_What do I deserve when I get out? Do I deserve you back?"_

"_I don't know," she shook her head. "I don't know what to do—I love you and John still, but differently and you both hurt me with this secret—each in a different way. But that doesn't change my feelings for either of you. Let's not look to the future right now—let's work on the present and getting you out of here and the help you need."_

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_Natalie had left the prison and driven home—letting her car drive nearly on auto-pilot. Almost to Llanfair she made a turn and began going to the one place she needed answers and get some of the frustration that was building inside of her. She gave a smile to the desk clerk downstairs and went straight for the elevator and pressed the button for the 4th floor._

_She walked into the office despite the pleas of the secretary. She wasn't busy—it was an inside joke at the station that the woman really didn't have any clients—so Natalie knew she wouldn't be taking any of her time._

"_Natalie," said a surprised Evangeline as she stood up quickly and tried to smooth the imaginary wrinkles out of her finely pressed suit—a move one usually did when nervous about a meeting that was taking place._

"_Don't stand for me. I'm here today to talk to you as the wife of a client you are representing—my husband, Cristian Vega."_

"_I'm sorry you had to learn that way," she said with a tilt of her head. "My sister—she can be quick to react at times."_

"_Yes she is, and you are so not sorry so don't lie to me," snapped Natalie. "I visited Cristian today—he said you think you can get him out. How so?"_

"_I can't go into many details, but we have a clue as to what or who is causing the headaches. I'll see what I can do Natalie—hopefully I'll get him freed and you two can be together."_

"_Good. He doesn't belong in there."_

"_No, he doesn't."_

"_When did you start agreeing with everything I said?"_

"_I thought we were past the point of meaningless bickering, Natalie."_

"_We were—until you had your sister break into John's apartment and find something to split us apart. Now—we're just enemies again."_

"_I'm sorry to hear that."_

"_Me too. Listen—I have no reason to request this of you, but as my family has a large part of this town I feel I need to. We're grateful that you're going to get Cristian freed, but maybe once that is done and he's under the watchful care of doctors you should just quietly leave."_

"_Why should I do that? I've got a thriving law firm here."_

"_Really?" she said with a raised eye brow as she thought something else. "Let me put it this way then—I'm not sure who I'm going to chose yet. Cristian or John—but if it is John I chose I will tell you I'm not above fighting for what I want. You know that already, Evangeline. So save ourselves and him the hassle and just step aside gracefully."_

"_Who says John's not going to be noble and step aside for you to be with Cristian?"_

_Natalie smirked, it was a loaded statement, but she thought of the first thing that came to her mind as she turned and walked out of the office, "Nobility, my dear Evangeline, is highly overrated."_

Evangeline did eventually slink out of town unknown—her sister in tow. Nobody, not even her best friend Nora heard from her after that. And it wasn't until years later that a single article with her name in it came about. Natalie still laughed at what the article detailed.

_Natalie smiled at seeing her sister walk in and up the bar at Rodi's—they'd been so busy she didn't even realize it was lunch time. She was sure John and Nash would show up later—just late enough so that her and Jessica could gossip some before lunch._

_The first thing she noticed was a smirk on Jess's face and a piece of paper she kept tapping on the bar, "What's got you so happy?"_

"_Read this," she said as she slid the paper over and Natalie opened it to see her uncle's handwriting scribbled in the corner. Jess, Natalie should enjoy this. It'll be in the gossip column of The Sun tomorrow. Todd._

_ A former semi-famous resident of Llanview was arrested yesterday at a Beverly Hills boutique yesterday after being accused of shoplifting andthen hitting the clerk when confronted about it._

_ The former resident in question was Layla Williamson—who has done few movies since she left here, most of them being flops or such small parts that if you blink you miss her._

_ When questioned as to why she did shoplift she said she was preparing for a role she was auditioning for later that day._

_ Her lawyer, and sister, Evangline stated she thought though her sister should have tried a different way to prepare for the role her sister is a gentle and quiet-natured person and was sure the assault charges would be dropped soon._

_Natalie looked up from reading the last line at her sister's grinning face and just burst out laughing, "Oh God—so that's what she's up to these days? Getting her sister out of shoplifting and assault charges?"_

"_Guess so," she laughed as she saw John and Nash walking in together and grabbed the paper from her sister and putting it in her purse. "Hey—you two are here early," she grinned, as Natalie tried to control her laughter._

"_Did I miss something?" asked John as he looked at Nash._

"_You and me both. Want to share?"_

"_Uhm, no—it's nothing," said Natalie as she wiped the tears from her eyes and tried to look at John with a straight face but the laughter began all over again between both her and Jess._


	4. Chapter 4

A/N: Alright--as the song goes--ain't too proud to beg, so here goes.

Jess sweetie--I've given you a chapter so whatcha say? An eye for an eye? A chapter for a chapter? hehehe. If you want to be stubborn I'll see if I can muster something else up soon, but I'm hoping this is enough. Ya'll enjoy! Until next time--I'll even become a Yankees fan if you update (this offer is only good for Jess--not for Gracie, LOL--PCGirl.

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"You beat me again," grinned Thomas as he stood at the pool table at Rodi's with Katie—a part time employee while she attened LU.

"You'd think with your mom being as good as she is she'd have given you some pointers," she laughed.

"Yeah? Well, give me another chance—maybe I was just letting you win."

John watched the conversation from the doorway of Rodi's—what was it with McBain men and red heads? He just grinned and continued onto the bar—Thomas was falling fast and he didn't even realize it yet. He'd learned nearly twenty one years ago that if you waited too long it could cost you everything.

_John stood in the doorway to Rodi's—he'd been standing there for nearly half an hour trying to figure out exactly what to say. He knew he was on trial here—he was both the defendant and his own attorney—Natalie was his judge and jury—and what she said would seal his fate. Had he waited too long? It'd been weeks since the ordeal at the Palace and the one conversation they had at the apartment._

_He took a deep breath and walked in—he had one shot—one shot for her to hear him out—hopefully she hadn't already made her up her judgment._

_Rex caught sight of John first, "I thought I smelt bacon."_

"_Rex!" said Natalie through laughter. "I'm sorry—I shouldn't be laughing," she smiled at John._

"_It's ok—I deserve it," he said as he looked at Rex. "Can you let me talk to Natalie for a minute?"_

"_Ok—but I'm watching you," he said as he took his drink and food to an empty table._

_John looked at Rex for a moment then back to Natalie, "Hey."_

"_Hi," she said with a raised eyebrow—her demeanor changing now to what he expected of her—hurt and distrust._

"_Listen—can we later—when you get off—find a private, neutral place to talk."_

"_You've been in seclusion with your bottle for the past few weeks—why talk now?"_

_He shrugged, "Because I got my head on straight and we need to clean the air. So when do you get off?"_

"_I close up tonight. Come here and we'll talk as I clean up—ok?"_

"_Ok. I'll see you later," he said as he turned and left—ignoring the stares from Rex as he left. She wouldn't have agreed to talking to him if he didn't have a chance—right? He hoped so—he didn't know what to do if he had no chance._

"_I'm surprised your guard dog wasn't at the door waiting," said John—speaking of Rex—as he walked into the empty bar._

"_He's harmless," she grinned. "Just like yours."_

"_Yeah—I guess our little brother's worry about us a bit too much. But it's good to know you'll always have someone that has your best interests at heart," he said with a chuckle of how bad that sounded at a time like this. "I'm sorry—."_

"_Don't apologize, John—that's what tonight is about—right? You explaining why you did what you did—me trying to decide whether it's you or Cris I want to be with. Even though I don't know myself."_

"_You don't have to make any decisions tonight—I promise. I'm just glad you let me come in," he said as he took the trash bag from her and went around the bar emptying cigarette butts while she wiped down the tables and sat the chairs up behind him. They were quiet for a minute before he finally spoke, "So what's your first question for me?"_

_She gave out a deep sigh and stopped what she was doing and looked at him, "Why did you let him go to jail? I mean Evangeline seems so sure she can get him out now—what were the chances before he'd been able to do the appeal?"_

"_He wanted to go to jail—it was his choice."_

"_And you freely went along with it? Just like you freely went along with keeping the truth from me?" she spitted back at him._

"_He loves you—wanted to protect you from wasting your life on a man that you could only visit through a barred window. That's no life for you Natalie—I've seen more spouses than I care to admit have to watch their significant other get carried off in handcuffs. Do you know what that does to both of them? It breaks the person on this side of the bars just as bad is breaks the other one. I couldn't watch you break like that—not again."_

"_So figuring Cristian was dead and I'd slept with a stranger was better?"_

_He gave out a deep sigh, "No—that hurt me just as bad, but I gave my word."_

_There was silence in the air as they finished with the tables and she went and got the broom—but he took it from her hands and motioned for her to start cleaning off the bar area. Natalie broke the silence this time, "I'm going to see Cristian tomorrow. It's his first visit with the psychologist—and I'm going to stand by him until he's free. I already told him this, but you need to hear it too—you deserve to hear it as your just a part of the giant elephant in the room as me and him are._

"_I'm not making a choice between either of you until he's free. Until he has a chance to fight of me. So tell me John—are you going to fight for me?"_

"_With all I have," he said as he walked over to the bar and leaned on it. "You brought me out of this dark place I was in for so long. And if you're giving me another chance I'll take it because I never though I'd love another woman after Caitlyn and you proved me wrong."_

"_John," she sighed._

"_Ok, ya know what? I'm gonna—I'm going to go because you need to finish cleaning up," he said as he put down the broom and walked towards the door. "Goodnight, Natalie."_

"_Goodnight," she said quietly as she walked him leave. She stood there for the longest time just trying to figure out what she was going to do._

For the next month John was there at Rodi's almost everyday—talking to her—listening to her, letting her know he wasn't going anywhere.

One night in early January though it all changed.

_John walked into the bar and almost immediately wished he'd never come in. The first instinct something was wrong was of Nash standing by the doorway brooding. He followed his line of sight to see Cristian and Antonio sitting at a table with both Jessica and Natalie, "What's going on? Why aren't you sitting with Jess?"_

"_Ask her—I'm outta here," he said as he turned and left in a huff—Jessica and Natalie both look to the door and seeing John watching them._

"_Hold on," said Natalie as she got up and walked over. "Hey," she said with a slight smile._

"_Hey—I didn't know the appeal went through today."_

"_Yeah, he's on parole until they finish being able to charge Carlo Hesser with the whole brain washing and wanting the Vega's and Santi's dead. We're—celebrating," she paused as she looked over to Jessica._

"_Yeah—now I know why Nash left out of here so quickly. Antonio force him away? I'm sorry—that was wrong of me to say—you go on celebrating. Tell Cris I'm happy for him—he's got his life back."_

"_John," she pleaded as he began to walk off._

"_He deserves some time with his wife—I'm not giving up the fight—just know that," he said as he touched the side of her face with his fingers._

"_Ok," she said as she bit her lip and nodded before going back to the table—being quiet and feeling very uneasy._

"_What was that all about?" asked Cristian._

"_John was just coming in for some dinner—but he changed his mind," she shrugged._

"_Yeah, well I wish he'd change his mind about living here altogether," laughed Cris._

"_Him and Nash both," said Antonio as he took a sip of his beer._

"_You used to be friends with John—how can you say that Antonio?"_

"_People change," he shrugged._

"_Yeah—they do," said Jessica quietly as her and Natalie exchanged silent glances._

_----------------_

_Natalie put her key in and heard the click of it unlocking. She'd been surprised to see a light was still on in the apartment and when she walked into the living room she smiled. He was stretched out on the couch with a bunch of files lying on the coffee table and one was on his chest. "Hey," she said softly as she ran touched his face—he looked so peaceful._

_His eyes fluttered open and for a moment he thought he was dreaming, "Hey—what are you doing here?"_

"_I'm coming home—what do you think I'm doing?" she laughed as she kneeled down next to him._

"_How did tonight go? How was Cristian?"_

_She shook her head and her eyes got watery, "Jess and I had a long talk—we realized neither of the Vega boys are the men we fell in love with. She's probably sharing a glass of wine with Nash right now at the Palace Bar—and I'm here—right where I belong."_

"_Do they know?" he asked as he sat up and put the file to the side._

"_Cristian does—after Jess went to find Nash I called him and we talked in Angel Square—peacefully," she reassured him when he gave her a wary look. "We've both changed, but we both know we're always going to be important to the other one. He's upset, but I think he gets it."_

"_It was never a fight over who you'd pick Natalie—I just wanted you happy."_

_  
"And I am—because I'm with you—don't you get it John? I'm here because even with everything that happened—even when you kept that secret from me and I was heartbroken because of it—I couldn't imagine not being there with you through whatever else life decides to throw at us. I love you John."_

_He laughed at hearing her say those words, "I never thought I'd hear you say them again—not to me at least."_

"_It's always been you John—for a very long time," she smiled as she got up onto the couch—straddling him there for a moment before pushing him back with a hard kiss. "I want it to be you that's with me from now until we're old and grey, ok?"_

"_Ok," he said with a grin as he stood up, her legs scissor locking around him as he carried her to their bed._

_This was his second chance—and he was going to thank God for every extra moment he got to spend with Natalie—the woman he loved._


	5. Chapter 5

A/N: This is the end of my little story--hope you enjoyed it, and it's dedicated to my hubby--for reasons some of you might know, and if not check chapter 10 of Red and Black and you'll get a clue ;) Until next time--ya'll are the best, as always--PCGirl.

PS. There's lyrics to part of the chapter, but I'm taking them out here--either e-mail me or check the yahoo board to read it with lyrics.

-------------------------

"Have I ever told you I love you in this color?" asked John as he walking up behind Natalie and slid an arm around her waist—pulling her backwards and against him as she slipped an earring in. She'd found the dress months ago and bought it for tonight—it had a halter style top that went around the back of her neck and then flowed down to the floor—with a wrap to go with it in matching a turquoise color.

"I think you mentioned it once," she smiled as she turned and leaned up to kiss him. "And thank you for putting this on again—I know you hate to wear one of these," she said as she tugged at the open jacket.

John gave a half eye-roll at wearing the tux, "Yeah—well for you I'd do anything—you know that."

She nodded at his words, "I love you."

"I love you too," he said as he lifted her head up gently and gave her a slow kiss that quickly became deeper and rougher than he'd planned. When he pulled himself away she saw his eyes were a clear blue, "Do we have to go?"

"Yeah, but there'll be more of that later," she said, giving him a second kiss and leading the way out of the bedroom and down the hall. They walked down the stairs and didn't see either Meghan or Thomas but noticing the basement door was cracked John pointed her towards it and they began walking down the steps. Halfway down Natalie whispered up, "Remember the first time we caught them trying to play pool?"

John shook his head and laughed at the memory

"_I'm going to start dinner," said Natalie as she came down the steps and saw John sitting at his desk in the living room looking over a file he'd brought home. She stopped walking through the room when she noticed the tv was off and hadn't heard any noise upstairs either, "John, where are the kids?"_

"_They aren't upstairs?" he asked, looking up from the file._

"_No," she said slowly and noticed the door downstairs wasn't shut all the way and she opened it and could hear Meghan's voice—she began to walk down slowly and John got up and followed behind her. As they turned the corner she had to cover her mouth to keep from laughing—they had pushed the ottoman from the leather furniture set in the room directly next to the end of the table and her seven year old daughter was now standing precariously on it, and holding a pool cue while Thomas tried at the other end to rack the balls and get them more into the center of the table._

_As Meghan did what she considered breaking (when in reality all she did was barely tap the one ball and the thirteen ball moved a millimeter, which was probably due to the poor racking) she began to lose her balance and John rushed over to grab her, "Hey there, missy."_

"_I told her not to do it," said Thomas quickly—any loyalty he showed to his sister for the idea was gone now._

"_It's ok. But if you two want to learn to play you need to ask for our help—we'll show you the right way," said Natalie to both of them. "You teach them John while I make dinner," she said with a wink as she went back up the stairs and let him try his best at teaching two seven year olds the basics of pool._

"Ugh—you are such an amateur—I swear I'm getting you a video for Christmas," groaned Meghan downstairs as she watched her brother try to make an impressive shot and scratched instead.

"Where have I heard that before?" whispered John into Natalie's ear and watched her catch herself from laughing. Looking at them both standing there him and Natalie had been right that day at the hospital.

"_What are you thinking?" she said softly as she held a newborn Thomas in her arms while John sat in the rocking chair just staring at a sleeping Meghan._

"_I guess I was wondering who they will be more like—that and how we could have created such a beautiful miracle."_

_She smiled at hearing him say those words, "I'm hoping they'll be just like us—Thomas will be a protector and Meghan can be headstrong and stubborn."_

"_Great—I've already got one stubborn red head on my hands," he laughed as he touched the top of her head where a small amount of reddish-fuzz was. She squirmed slightly at his touch but then relaxed herself again._

"_But most of all I don't ever want them to think we love them second to our love for each other. And that they won't ever have to feel heartache." She was quiet for a moment before speaking again, "I know we can't protect them forever—I get that, but I just—I just would like for them find their one true love and then never—never have to say goodbye to them. You know?"_

"_Yeah," he said with a nod and they both were silent. "You don't always find the one you were meant to be with first though—sometimes it takes a few tries to get it right."_

"_Yeah," she said as she bit her lip and nodded and looked down at Thomas. "So you two listen closely because we'll probably show you this more with feelings and actions than words—you two are going to be our whole lives. We're going to show you that loving someone else isn't a scary thing—it's a blessing and a joy, and don't ever ever walk away from the chance of seeing if you love someone. If it doesn't happen the first time then its ok—you'll know when it does because that will be the person that you think about when you are away from them. The person you will want to be better than you truly are for. Don't change for anyone—if they want you to change then they really aren't the right one—just an illusion of what you truly want and deserve."_

"What are you two doing?" asked John as him and Natalie stood on the steps watching them.

"Just trying to show doofus here how to play a good game of pool for once," egged Meghan as she stood there in her burgundy dress and Thomas was at the other end of the table—his jacket thrown over the couch and his sleeves slightly pushed up his arms.

"Alright—well there will be plenty of time for lessons later—we need to get going," said Natalie as Thomas fixed his shirt and grabbed his jacket before hitting the lights and following the rest upstairs.

-------------------

Natalie and John danced slowly on the dance floor they had made at the Palace for the party—Kelly and Kevin were on one side of them dancing while Jessica and Nash danced nearby also. At a nearby table Meghan and Thomas sitting with all of their cousins—Matthew, Lauren and Andy, Kelly and Kevin's kids Riley and Kara, Gabby, Michael and Marcie's daughter, and Ana—Rex's daughter.

She grinned at seeing that a few of the employees from Rodi's had showed up, obviously taking her up on the suggestion of closing early and joining the party, and glad to see Katie had changed out of the normal Rodi's clothes and put on a short black dress instead.

"Uh oh—I think our son is about to get ribbed," she said as she motioned towards Katie standing with the other employees feeling out of place.

"He already is," said John, his words muffled as he placed a kiss in her hair. As she looked over she could already see Matthew, Riley, and Andy were beginning to push him into going and dancing with her. "Poor guy—he's going to hear about this from now on."

"Just until he admits what is staring him in the face—hope it doesn't take him two years," she smiled up at him and he pulled her closer. "I love you, John."

"I love you too," he said as he pulled her out onto the patio for a few minutes. "Look at the stars," he said as he leaned on the railing and looked above.

"Yeah," she smiled looking up also and remembering a night just like this from years ago.

"_So what are we doing up here?" asked Natalie as she looked away from the stars for a moment and to John as they both stood on the roof the Angel Square Hotel. John had left her a cryptic note at home and she'd followed it and other clues here—seeing him just standing there and staring at the stars._

"_I thought this was a good place for us to talk—to clear the air of anything that needs to be said before we go to the next step."_

"_Clear the air?" she said uneasily and wondering where this was going._

"_The first time we were up here—I said there were things from time to time I'd need to keep from you. Well, not anymore—I don't want to keep anything from you and I'm not promising to keep anyone else's secrets if it concerns you in the least."_

"_I already knew that though, John. It hurt you just as much as it did me—I see that now."_

_He put his head down for a few seconds before he continued speaking, "There's more though—there is one promise I want to make to you in the future—whenever you are truly ready. I want to promise to love you and be with you everyday for the rest of our lives."_

_The next few seconds felt like she was watching in slow motion as he got on his knee and pulled out a simple box, "John? What are you doing?" she asked, with a nervous laugh as tears filled her eyes._

"_If you had asked either of us two years ago would we ever find someone to be happy with again I know we would have both said no, but we did—in each other. I want that happiness and love to grow more with each passing day—if you'll let it to continue happening—so Natalie, will you let me promise to you the one thing that means more than any other promise or secret in the world—to be beside you from now on, no matter what else is thrown our way we'll both know the other one is there for us? Marry me, Natalie."_

_"Yes, yes," she said as she got onto her knees also and threw her arms around him in a hug. When she pulled away a small wet spot was on John's shirt from the tears she let flow. She saw the uncertainty in John's eyes and she just laughed, "Sorry—but you never say anything—of course I'm going to get emotional when you say more than a few words."_

"_I need to work on that, I guess," he grinned as he put the ring on her finger. "This is forever."_

"_Forever," she said to herself as she looked at the ring and then back up at John—his blue eyes sparkling with a love she knew was only for her._

"Where were you just then?" asked John as he saw her come back to reality and out of the daydream she'd been in.

"Just thinking of another night under the stars with you," she smiled and leaned up for a kiss. "Forever."

"Forever," he said softly back to her.

-----------------

"Hold on—let me sign these papers and then we can head on to the house—I promise," said Natalie as her and John walked into a closed Rodi's after the party. They had said goodnight to everyone earlier than expected—and tomorrow they were off to a quiet B&B in Massachusetts with no phones or e-mail to bother them with outstanding payments or cases.

That's why they were here at Rodi's—so she could sign papers now and not in the morning when she was sure something would come up.

As she finished the last paper she heard the jukebox turned on and she looked over to see John standing there next to the pool table with his hand extended, "What are you doing, McBain?" she laughed.

"One last dance for the night—nobody's here, just you and me, here and now," he said with a smile as she took his hand and danced one more dance to a song she remembered hearing on the same juke box years ago.


End file.
